Wednesday, April 30

The Toronto Maple Leafs: Omnipresence

As I struggle to give a shit... wait, sorry. I'll start again. As I stay glued to the playoffs even though the Leafs aren't involved, my beloved ones are never far from my mind. Like in yesterdays post I wondered aloud what difference Sundin would be making on a Canadiens squad which desperately needs a man around the house. Watching the Pens/Rangers series, if you can call it that, I'm enjoying watching Hal Gill a lot, because, what do I care if he makes a mistake? (Please Note: 1) I do care a little as I want the Rangers out of it, home, and in bed by Friday. And 2) Hal's just not making that many mistakes.)

I'm also buoyed by the news that roughly 2/3 's of the nominees for the Hart this year were linemates with our very own Nikolai Kulemin. At the World Championships in 2006, Ovechkin, Malkin and Kulemin played on the same line, and Kulemin and Malkin were paired together when Malkin played for Magnitogorsk Metallurg in the Blorska Nofski Jorkavet. This wasn't one of those Sundin and Jonas Hoglund deals, either. Metallurg coach Dave King gave a mighty two thumbs up to Niki, saying, when asked about the two:

"All of a sudden, he shows he can make a lot of plays. The play didn't stop with him, he made the next play. Suddenly, Malkin was on a tear, the line was a real plus line and, really, the key element was Nikolai Kulemin."
"He's a two-way hockey player. He's got the ability to add to your offence. He can make good plays, he can also score. Beyond that, what really impressed me, was his defensive anticipation. His ability to read the game defensively and make the right play."
Well hooray for us. So taking it a step further, if Ovechkin is like Bure and Malkin is like Mogilny, then by King's description, Kulemin is...Federov? Holy shit! We drafted Federov! And not Fedor, either! The good brother! AWESOME!


In other news, the Penguins of Pittsburgh are making a laughingstock out of their opponents by now going 7-0 in the post season. In a weird post-loss scrum, Jaromir Jagr responded to the pressure the Pens are putting on him by threatening to quit and by growing a Hitler moustache.
This is the real picture. I didn't touch his face up. I mean, Jaro, we all face stress in our lives. Sometimes the store runs out of that wine I like to serve to all the ladies, and I'm like, "Noo-ooo!" But I kinda, get over it. I don't...You do all see that Jaromir Jagr has a Hitler moustache, right? This isn't one of those things I want to be on my own about. Right! Right?


Down Goes Brown said...

Just because a guy has a short moustanche doesn't mean you should compare him to Hitler. I mean, it's not like the guy runs around saluting everyone.

Wait, what?

Jaredoflondon said...

if you say it with a German accent it even sounds similar.



ok, now



Navin Vaswani said...

Kulemin is seriously boner inducing. This kis is already going to have a ton of pressure on his shoulders, lol...

as for Jagr, he was pretty damn emotional last night. tough to argue with how he's been playing, though. he's been great. and i love how he's getting in sidney's face and trying to get him to stop diving like the little bitch he is.

Green said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Greener said...

You're right Nav. People have always gotten on Jagr's back for being disinterested and not caring. It must be infuriating to him to really give a damn and to still lose.

Loser Domi said...

Maybe Jagr's trying to look like Charlie Chaplin. I bet you didn't even think of that one!

Seriously, it looks like he cut a chunk from a carpet sample and hot glued it there. yikes

Down Goes Brown said...

Warning: Staring at Jagr's beard for too long can cause your spleen to lacerate.

(Too soon?)

Jaredoflondon said...

It's never too soon, or late, or inapropriate to make fun of Sean Avery.

Norte said...

if you turn the photo of Jagr upside down