Friday, September 5

GOING, GOING, GONE

Reminiscing is dangerous. Besides being habit forming, it also leaves you at risk for the romantic. And the romantic, like being drunk, clouds your vision with glasses so rosey, that they once starred in a movie with Ray Milland. It’s like being drunk, but with less making out with fat chicks (whom I happen to adore). Reminiscing is what makes your first apartment cozy and full of charm, instead of the cramped, cockroach infested expensive anus that it was. (Remind me one day to tell you the story of the paper thin walls and my next door neighbor, the hustler.) Reminiscing is what makes all the crazy women who ever left you emotionally battered and bruised, lovely, eccentric and misunderstood. In other words, reminiscing can really fuck with you.

As this version of the Toronto Maple Leafs lost another piece of its longtime puzzle, the Captain, I have heard, of that country club atmo which stunk up the dressing room like Eau de Home Permanent parfume. The trade with the Panthers, the worst kept secret in hockey since that one about Daniel Alfredson and the gerbil, also included perpetually limp-wristed Mike Van Ryn and a 4th rounder (that Fletch sent with McCabe) that was hopefully no more than compensation for Chad "I don’t want to take my medication" Kilger.

I know that McCabe told Kypreos that there was no interest in him at trade deadline last year but Florida seems an odd choice with which to waive his NMC. What's worse is that Martin couldn't have been swindled in the deal somehow.

I don’t want to toot my own horn (not yet, but the yoga helps) but I predicted McCabe being run out of town Larry Murphy style in a post last year. Okay truth be told, I could be making that up as I am too lazy to find the actual post I wrote it in. Hopefully He Score/He Shoot's very own J. Jonah Jameson, Greener, will and surgically implant the link here (in brackets) thus making it look like I did all the work and sort of making the whole last part of this paragraph pretty moot.
Does anyone else notice the alarming rate with which Fletch is giving away our drafts? Not to backseat GM but isn't this the 9th or 10th he's given away?
Regardless, it's a sad end for a warhorse like Brian. No matter how terrible some of his gaffs were. In a way he's being punished for JFJ and the alarmingly terrible job he did. Which reminds me of a teacher I once had named Mr. Owen. Mr Owen was that special kind of teacher-cunty that makes you want to set upon them with a pillowcase full of doorknobs. Mr Owen hated me even before I stepped foot in his class because he once taught my brother.

I think everyone agreed Brian had to move down the couch as it were, that his time here was finished and he was wanted as piles. And as I reminisce (which, as I have already stated, is never a good idea) and wonder what Brian McCabe could've/would've gotten at the trade deadline 2 years ago my head already hurts. So I ask you readers - had we traded Brian 2 years ago when his asking rate was at a premium - who do you think we could've/would've had for him? Ow, my brain.

9 comments:

Greener said...

Its got that word in it.

Norte said...

I want mine in my tushy.

Moose said...

Hypothetically...what if, two years ago, Ottawa was offering Daniel Alfredsson?

Norte said...

Yes - but - it would have had to be a three way deal - with DA being shipped out.

eyebleaf said...

that Muskoka picture is fucking awesome.

and i'm still not happy with this mccabe deal.

Connie said...

Moot... haha

R-Gib said...

Ah haaaahahahahahaha! McCabe! Leafs! Mortgaged future!

Oh...sorry 'bout that... my fingers have a way of typing every inappropriate thing that pops into my head...

Ummm, I would have given a hockeybag full of pucks for a 2006 McCabe... or maybe a pillowcase full of doorknobs? ;P

Ok seriously, I would have given up a Souray or maybe an '06 Bertuzzi straight up for an '06 McCabe. (Hmmm, a Bertuzzi straight up sounds like a beverage to me.)

Norte said...

-a straight up Bertuzzi comes with a little umbrella and when you aren't looking it knocks you on your ass

R-Gib said...

Yup I hear some call it "the Neck Snapper".