Monday, June 15

Senators Hire Leeder. Well, Now They Have One

Taking a cue from the voices in his head, Ottawa Senators farmer Eugene Melnyk continues his comi-tragic rearranging of the Titanic deck chairs, by booting one loser inside his creep-filled organization for another. Out is former president Roy "No, That's Actually How You Spell It" Mlakar. In is current COO, the unbelievably named, Cyril Leeder.

Not even hairy Ottawa native Alanis Morissette could miss the irony in a guy named "Leeder" taking a position with the Ottawa Senators. The Sens, a bunch so gutless their team photos look like a bunch of x-rays, have gone without any sort of team leadership since they re-emerged from the filthy Rideau Canal to once again pollute the NHL with their overweight fans, heartless play, and ugly uniforms. The only time the Senators did anything great were the years between 1934 and 1992. These heady times were the decades the team didn't exist, or as I call them, "The Good Ole' Days".

Leeder, seen here conferring with Daniel Alfredsson, has been with the Senators since its very inception, and, despite the diabolical karmic implications of his actions, appears to be relatively tumor free. He replaces the long serving Mlakar, who was damned by faint praise by Melnyk who said he had,

"...contributed greatly to defining the Ottawa Senators and our relationship with our community and our fans."
...which means creating a team of losers and their followers becoming the laughingstock of the league. In the meantime, Mlakar is now free to pursue his hopes and dreams, and this morning heard the sound of his own laughter for the first time in 13 years.

Wednesday, June 10

RUMORS, TRUCULENCE AND WHEELING AND DEALING ON THE DRAFT ROOM FLOOR

During the MLSE press conference introducing Brian Burke as new Leafs GM, amid talk of plumber jobs, patience and of building from the net out, right after Burke's track record was trumpeted but just before admitting to a little dumb luck, he spoke of pugnacity, testosterone, truculence and belligerence.

With a couple of weeks (15 days actually -ed.) left before draft day and a full season behind us, surely Brian wasn't speaking of this time right now. Because as we sit 7th in a 5 horse race, pugnacity, testosterone, truculence and belligerence are exactly what's needed to either move up or to wheel and deal.

Everyone knows that this draft is the deepest in years, but general consensus says that there is the top 5 then a drop, the next 5 and then another drop. I feel like we may be able to move up 2 more spots - but if not, 7th suits me fine. And at 7th I've read the speculation that we'd take everyone from Jared Cowen to Magnus Svensson-Paajarvi. I think it's a safe call to say that Brayden Schenn will not be available at 7. I think I even heard Burke say so himself in an interview.

(As I write this there is talk and it's making me barf in my mouth a little. Apparently, the Heater, Dany Heatley, has requested a trade. What's making my mouth well with bile is that I keep hearing he will be traded for this year's 5th. And we all know that those godamned cock-sucking assholes will pick Schenn just to spite us. They're just the type of disgraceful douchebags to do so).


This years top 3 seems to be set. And even though all signs seem to point to Matt Duchene absolutely killing it at the combine, he is still #3 on everyone's list. Top 2 seems to be a tossup. More often than not it's JT going first, but I've seen more than a few postings where the Isles take Hedman. Leave it to Canadian media to eat its own and call Tavares' defensive ability into question and get the next one picked 2nd.

Of course the rumours are flying, some of my favourites are; Grabovski and our 7th to Atlanta for their 4th. (Apparently they're very interested in Evander Kane who will still be available at 7).

Or that horrid one about Kaberle, Strahlman and our 1st to the Rangers for Dubinsky, Stall, Redden and their 1st (19th). This one scares me because its Stall and, let's face it, Dubinsky is a Burke type player. And at 19th, in this years draft, I believe we could still get a Landon Ferraro or a Scott Glennie or maybe even a Carter Ashton, who's dad Brent, spent nearly 15 years in the league. And not that long ago Ryan Getzlaf went 19th (not to mention Mike Richards 24th and Corey Perry 28th).

But Wade fucking Redden? Besides having that sens stink of awfulness still on him, his contract is so bad, so Mike Millbury-esque that its a shock that Slats still has a job.
I would take any Stall any day of the week...but Wade Redden? I think I would rather have Andrew Raycroft as my number 1.

Did anyone else read that ridiculous rumour written by a supposed former consulting aide to Brian Burke? Who after being 'let go' delivered (via a Damian Cox message board) some set in stone drivel that came with a spoiler alert warning and had us trading away; Justin Pogge, Tomas Kaberle, Mikhail Grabovski, Pavel Kubina, 40% of Kubina's contract, two 2nd round picks in 2009, Matt Stajan, and the 7th pick in 2009 for the 3rd and 4th picks overall. Where we select Hedman and Schenn.(The Heatley talk is still going on and on but as I write this I've been thinking, what with Heatley making it public he wants a trade, does such public knowledge not open the doors for them to be low-balled? Not to mention a brutal 5 year, $7.5M contract that also contains a NTC/NMC. (So say goodbye to all of those top picks from re-building teams). Of course the fans of that team; those ghastly, caked-on ass-eaters are all overvaluing him and thinking they are dealing from a position of strength, imagining picks and prospects returning.
Hope you Tiva-wearing cunts like Olli Jokinen or Patrik Marleau. God I hate you all so much).

A few others....Kaberle and our first in 2010 to the Bolts for their 2nd and Ryan Malone. (An obvious salary dump). And/or Kubina, Poni, 7th and a 2nd to the Avs for their 3rd. Where we would then draft either Hedman or Tavares (again depending on #1) and Duchene with that 3rd. Talk like that gets my mouth watering because we would instantly become young and very talented.

It would be the next step in the long term solution for us poor Leafs fans. We'd be free of that Pat Quinn schematic; Play your veterans and pay them bloated salaries that don't match performance or production. Insist that signing 30+ year olds makes more sense than the draft-schmaft. Brad Boyes for Owen Nolan.

It's about developing your talent and using free agency to compliment that core, not the other way around.

The point is this: trade rumours and number of draft picks aside, I really believe our supporting cast is falling into place. Perhaps we need a Boogaard here, and a Beauchemin there. Personally I would stay away from Komiserak but chase JBo - thus allowing us the leverage of trading Kaberle and Kubina come Canada Day.

And finally all this talk about the Sedins coming to the Leafs. What bothers me is this. I keep reading how they want to stay in Vancouver; but if Gillis doesn't and hasn't signed them then what does that ultimately say about the faith he has in them? PPG guys yes, amazing ability to find each other on the ice yes, red pubes - yes.
And it's not a cap issue, as Vancouver, like Toronto, have lots of cap space. So something stinks in B.C, and this time it's not all the drunken Indians.