Thursday, February 7

BEATING A DEAD HORSE: NOW NOT JUST A EUPHEMISM FOR MASTURBATION

My opinion of the Florida game is the same as yours. Quite frankly Greener wrote about it below and my opinion is the same as his. And at this point the least said the better.
It almost ruined, for me, what happened on Saturday night. (I said almost.)Ultimately, (bigger picture ultimately) I don’t care if the Leafs lose every game from here on out. All I ask is that they beat the team from ottowo every time they play. I really love that it was on HNIC too so all them wool socked friggers were watching.
I must admit I especially liked how bad it made Spezza and Ray “Wanna Step Outside?" Emery look. I tell you something, I’d rather have McCabe for 5 than Spezza for 7. Spezza for 7? Now that’s over paying.

And let me ask you this: Which razor would you rather have on your team?

And a big He Score, He Shoot, ‘atta boy to Robbie Earl who not only got his first NHL point, on Hockey Night in Canada no less, but also showed as much hustle as the Van McCoy wikipedia page. With a spinnarama pass so good he made it look cinchy. Colaiacovo, fresh from not being injured, finished the play for the (eventual) game winner. Another ‘atta boy to the out of nowhere Dominic Moore for his first goal as a Leaf.

Stat that made me vom a little in my mouth: 19 Games since Kyle Wellwood's last goal.

I have suddenly started feeling a little queasy about a few of the trades that have been bandied about. Shit, I have to admit; a few times I have been the bandier. But I have started to feel that there is something akin to a pack mentality happening? My last post I called it Trade Deadline Fever or something equally as dramatic and awesome. It’s like watching a fight and then suddenly finding your self stomping a guy who’s lying on the ground’s neck. There is something similar in bicycle racing: it’s called the peleton. In the peleton you don’t even have to peddle. You’re sucked into it, no questions asked.
It’s just like being a fan of the Leafs right now. We have been so terrible this year. Admittedly I have, shall we say, imbibed in my time, so the memory, like the ol’ gray mare, aint what she used to be but this is the worst that I can remember. Because of that it’s easy to get sucked into the vortex that surrounds our team right now. A place so full of greed and avarice that if it weren’t wearing socks you would call it the 1980’s.

It’s a fairly Canadian mentality to eat our own. Canada/Canadians love when the Leafs are terrible. Read the Toronto media after any game day and disagree with me. There are even Leafs fans who talk with relish about the Ballard years or Alan Bester as our number 1 goalie. Don’t even get me started on the guys who talk of conspiracies between the MLSE and the underground gambling dens of Toronto or the bastards who call Mats Sundin a bad Captain and over-rated.

What was I talking about? Oh yes. I read the papers and I think of the trades that can be made. The potential trades. Like I have written about already. It turned me into a monster…and quite frankly speculatin’ hurts my brain.

Recently I was in a social setting where I found myself defending the Leafs. Saying the usual, this team isn’t as terrible as it seems. Nobody would have predicted what we are facing this year. Excuse me, the dude has cancer. Yes, we’ve been blown out of the water, embarrassed in our home rink, booed by (some) fans, but we’ve also lost 17 games by one goal. And then it starts to hit me: the idea that maybe we shouldn’t trade everyone away. Maybe the problem isn’t the team. Elements of…yes, of course. I know I have talked about blowing this shit up (blowed up real good) but I am starting to think that that’s not the answer. This year is a write off. We know that already. But I am starting to think that trading away all of the pieces is as dramatically incorrect as keeping them all.
Do I think Mats should be traded? Yes, absolutely. Would I trade Kubina? Yes. Gill. Yes. McCabe and Blake….perhaps but only to free up cap space for the up-coming UFA free for all.

The point is we know we will finish near the bottom of the standings. It might not be ocean front but it’ll be ocean view, if you know what I mean. And everyone knows that in this years draft...really anywhere in the top 10 is a lock. Trading Mats makes sense strictly for the return. Parlay that first round pick with our own and then tinker and trade and sign in the off season.
In other words - Don’t trade Kaberle. The justification that Anton Stralman is the next Kaberle is not enough. Isn’t that a good thing? To have as many Kaberle’s as possible. I know his return would be amazing…but Kaberle is too big a piece of the future pie.

And finally... another 'atta boy to Mike B from Sudbury, Ontario our He Score, He Shoot Fan of the Week for his new Norte tattoo.Way to go, Mike!

6 comments:

Loser Domi said...

I'd love some future pie--it sounds delicious

Norte said...

Loser Domi are you coming on to me?

Greener said...

Man, Mike nailed it! It looks just like you!

You're next Loser Domi! Don't worry, I'm almost as handsome as Norte.

Loser Domi said...

Wait--is "Future pie" some sort of euphemism for something and I don't know what? 'Cuz I was thinking it was some sort of pastry of some sort. Maybe like a butter tart-type idea.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butter_tart


And I'm not coming on to anyone--I wouldn't want to end up like the HSHS version of Yoko Ono or anything. Sorry, fellas.

@greener: next for what? another tattoo? o...kay

Loser Domi said...

So wait--Norte is really one of the Backstreet Boys?

Norte said...

Domi

No no no...that's the incredible thing. That really is me. That guy and I look that much alike. The only difference is that I have bigger eyebrows.